The Garden

Dishwasher

2011-04-04T20:25:00.000-07:00

For the first seven years of our marriage I was the primary dishwasher at our household. Soon after Preston was born it was high time to replace me as the dishwasher. I was more than worn out by 10:00p.m. each night as I began the washing and waiting for the worn out Scott to arrive home from school on the crappy bus from SLC with a headache. (Ha those days of school are over!) We finally got a portable dishwasher that saved me at least an hour of washing a day. That baby blew up a few years ago and was replaced with a free dishwasher that worked until last fall. Once again one to two hours of my precious day have been spent washing dishes by hand. Why not have the boys do it you ask? Our kitchen is make shift with the remodel that starts and stops with the amount of money and time allotted to it. They would ruin the unfinished cabinets on either side of the sink with dripping water. A few weeks ago I was more than done with my precious time eaten up by washing dishes. Scott being Scott had purchased two Asko dishwashers for $100.00 from KSL shortly after the dishwasher went out but we had decided to reconfigure our base cabinet that houses the dishwasher. That would take several hours to build before we could install our "new" Asko. Hence the wait of six months. Where would Scott find the time? One to build the cabinet and two to install the dishwasher? With working for himself for so long and then securing his fancy new job there hasn't been any extra time. When is there extra time? After six months of waiting I had a brilliant idea. A deadline. He is always working against a deadline at his day job and with his side jobs. I gave him 9 days to get the dishwasher in and working or I was moving out to our psuedoparents house. I felt bad saying it because the poor guy is so overworked as it is. He made time to build the cabinet and installed the dishwasher with a blazing migraine two days before the deadline. He put everyone else's job on hold to do mine. I was more happy to not have to move out than I was about having a dishwasher. The dishwasher worked once and then it wouldn't drain. Oh! hades! He spent a few hours over the next days trying to figure it out. He finally said my time is worth more than this. Let's just get a crappy cheap dishwaher from RC Willey and be done with it! No, no, no. Scott can fix anything what was he saying? I went to RC Willey today and looked at the crappy $300.00 machines. No, no, no!!!!I want my snobby Asko and if he looked at these pieces of hud he would to. I reasoned it out with him. I asked him to give it one more try. He robbed the pump from the second uninstalled dishwasher and wah lah. I now have my snobby $50.00 working Asko. And another snobby $50.00 parts Asko in the drive. Don't come and steal it because the pump is gone and we will need to rob parts from it in the future.

Shopping

2010-08-02T22:23:00.000-07:00

I do my best not to go out with all three anymore. Scott's parents live a 20 minute drive from the closest grocery. I needed a few things and decided to chance it on the way to their house from my sister's. The boys took in their rainbow umbrellas that they had just gotten from Aunt Laurie. Of course they soon became swords and were yelled at by a customer. I of course became firm with them down on eye level when all of a sudden Garrett yelled, "Mom Clare" who took the opportunity to stand in the seat of the shopping cart and smile at all who passed the "don't you watch your kids mom." Preston sulked the rest of the quick walk through the store and Garrett pushed the cart which kept him occupied. Clare would not let me touch the cart after being pushed by Garrett.
Any time I take all three anymore it is a circus with them doing tricks down the isles. Or war with guns as they jump under close racks, and roll out to the next hiding spot. I pretend like they are not my kids.
Taking them singly is a joy. Clare bounces in the seat of the cart laughing. Garrett actually helps me. And Preston talks and talks so happy to have all my attention. I hope that was the last time I am ever so desperate that I chance taking all three in with me.

Chivalry

2010-06-14T21:45:00.000-07:00

Preston said, "Mom I want to see what it is like to protect girls."
"Why?"
"Because then I can punch someone. Even though my arms are wimpy."
"Your arms are wimpy?"
"Yah, Aidan felt my muscles and said they were squishy."

Preston is a prize!

Wood Floors

2010-06-06T21:54:00.000-07:00

I have awoken from a deep sleep on a number of occasions to a dancing boy trying to find the bathroom in the middle of the night. I have found them dancing in their closet, in the front hall closet, in the hallway, in the bathtub, in the living room. Scott and I jumped up at the same time tonight when we heard the stream of pee from their bedroom. There wasn't even a dance this time. I walked in to Preston standing in the middle of the floor finishing his business and then he jumped right back into bed. Not a word was spoken.
Once again I sing my praises to real wood floors. When looking for our house I requested wood floors and a working wood fireplace. They are so cleanable. I say real wood because laminates (i.e. pergo) would not withstand 72 years of use as these floors have.
This is a discussion Scott the Architect and I have often. Without the permanence of families living in the same home or same area as was once the norm people don't necessarily look into long term products for their homes. Short term solutions are typically less expensive and continue the cycle of poor quality homes.
The trend will change, people will tire of disposable homes, and we will think long term quality solutions once again and Scott will be your Architect.

Time

2010-06-01T23:39:00.000-07:00

With the few spare seconds I have in my head lately to think about free time I wonder what we did our first years of marriage. We have always been busy. But the last 10 years have sped increasingly faster. I can't remember conversations I had yesterday. My mind is so full that it pushes out even important information. There have been two instances this year when I was truly scared at my loss of information. One when I couldn't remember my SS #. And two when I could not remember Scott's work #. Both pieces of information that are always there. I tried and tried to find it in my memory but there were only empty spots when I searched. Truly a terrifying experience. I have always had an incredible memory.
Reading a friends blog has reminded me of those days when we traveled through Spain, Portugal, and Morocco. Our honeymoon to Italy. The vacation in Greece. Those were lucky, lazy, hard earned vacations. In the last 10 years of very hard work, school, and child rearing, the breaks have been very far and few between. A luxury has been to actually spend a Saturday or Holiday together without working.
I don't need a European vacation now (of course it would be nice). I just need time with Scotty and the kids. Looking forward to our much needed Washington break.

Oh! the struggles we Americans have? We have it so good!

A Mother's Day

2010-05-09T21:51:00.000-07:00

Happy Mother's Day to all. It started off with a bang. I was able to sleep in until 7:45 when I heard Clare going into a breath holding spell and jumped out of bed to grab her before she hit the floor. Garrett and Scott made breakfast (they even ground fresh flour for the pancakes) and Scott's parents were able to eat with us. I spent the morning Relief Societing as Sunday Mornings go for me now. Preston complained of not feeling well before church. What's new? He ended up asleep under the bench with a fever by the end of sacrament meeting. Scott went home with the two sick young ones for a glorious nap had by all. Garrett and I slowly walked home from church holding hands. We came home to Preston still fevered. Clare slept for five hours before Scott walked quietly into the room to get something and was hit by a wall of stench. The poor girl had the biggest blow out EVER (still asleep) all up the front of her chest and all up the back. She was carried half asleep to me in Scott's outstretched arms. "I can't handle this one!" he said, almost heaving. Ah, I'm THE MOM! it's all in a day for me, nothin' new. (To Scott's credit he changes Clare's poopy diaper almost every morning.) When a child is sick at our house they get special treatment, all the movies they want. They watched, How to Train Your Dragon ( sent by Uncle Andrew in China). I was so tired I fell asleep in the chair in the living room.
Oh! the lovely mother's day dinner, lest you wonder, was a delicious instant cup of soup. I heated the water myself. Awe, before you all go feeling sorry for me, we did have kahlua pig for lunch and no one wanted dinner. And....... Great Scott kept the house clean all day and the kids as happy as can be. Really, it was a wonderful day.
I write this because of what a sister in our ward said about journal keeping in her lesson. Sometimes she only writes a sentence. I think of our past 12 years of marriage and really wish I would have written even just a sentence more often. I want our kids to remember and know what a day was like for us. And hope that it will be of help to them.

Rooster

2010-04-26T23:24:00.000-07:00

Somehow one of those hens from a friend turned into a Rooster. I just kept thinking as soon as Scott is through with school we will take care of it. He was getting pretty annoying at 4 a.m. and I would put him in a box until mid morning. I didn't do this two mornings in a row and was surprised to not hear the rooster on the third morning. He was stiff and cold on the floor of the coop when I went to collect eggs. With the warm weather, people leaving their windows open, I assume someone got real tired of it and wrung it's neck in the early morning. Of all the birds that one dead? I could be wrong. Nature could have taken it but I doubt it. It's kind of freaky thinkin' of someone walking into the coop and wringing the poor birds neck.
If a bird ever has the misfortune of turning into a rooster in my coop again I will make sure it becomes soup long before someone gets mad enough to waste it.

Preston

2010-04-24T21:54:00.000-07:00

I leaned down to hug Preston in his bed tonight and whispered in his ear, "Good night I love you."
He said, "Mom what is that sweet voice your using?"
It took me a moment to process.
This is Preston always questioning, asking, and observing subtle differences.
He is wondering why I use a different voice when telling him I love him over the voice I use when it is time to brush his teeth, or choose a book to read for bed. Preston notices everything.

Sleep

2010-04-19T04:23:00.000-07:00

I awoke at 3 a.m. with Scott to finish the last items on his final project. He has left for school and I am unable to sleep. Highly unusual for me. Scott and I, mainly Scott have been working so hard on finishing up his final project. He has been working all semester on it but the last two weeks have been grueling for him. He is lucky if he sleeps a few hours a night. I have been staying up until one most nights and don't know how I am making it. I have only had a few hours sleep the last couple of days. I don't do well on so little but somehow I am making it. His brother, sister, my sister, and good friend all helped over the weekend finishing things up. It was due Sunday night at 6:00 p.m. (it's the U not BYU). Aunt Kimm probably saved his life driving him up to school in the middle of the night to laser cut and then back home (he hadn't slept that night). It's nice for them to understand how long the model building process is. How long it takes to render, and photo shop, draw up plans, design, create. The creative process never ends! On Tuesday he presents his final project. Friday he will be done with school. I can hardly believe this long process has finally come to an end. After he finished the undergraduate program I dreaded the day he would return for a master's. surprisingly the masters has been much easier on our family life than the undergraduate. We both learned what needed to happen from the undergraduate program to maintain a healthy relationship and family life. I was also expecting the worst. That always makes things better when you have very low expectations. I once had high expectations as far as how much Scott could help out around the house while in school and working. Once I didn't expect him at all to come to family events or be available everything was o.k. I knew it would all end. And the nice thing this year is he was able to come to a few things and help out far more than in the previous years of school. All these long hard days and years of school are finally over. This school years have been much like a serving a full time mission. So difficult and so worth it. A steady paycheck is coming our way. We will be able to have real weekends. Dad will be home at night.

We have been blessed with so much help these years of school. I was lucky to have my sister Laurie here last week to help with family here. I was the lucky one to have her stay with me. When Laurie comes all the laundry,dishes, diapers, ironing, everything is just taken care of. The microwave waits all year long for Aunt Laurie to come and clean it.

I didn't even remember it was our 12 year anniversary until 9:30 p.m. last night. I had taken a "real nice" freezer meal to Scott and Mike at work (where they were working on his project). The three of us celebrated, Ha.

My thought process is everywhere. Mulling over these years and how much was learned through the difficulty. We have grown. What is next for us?

Sophistimom

2010-04-01T09:47:00.000-07:00

If you want your kids to look really photogenic Jaime can help. Even Garrett, who has always been hard to photograph, looks like an angel (of course he is). Look here Sophistimom.

Spring Break For Scott...................

2010-03-22T22:42:00.000-07:00

arrived just in time. The list of needs around our house and family are endless. The washer really couldn't have gone one more day without being taken apart and cleaned. Scott woke up early (what's new?) to fix it before work. He took apart the plumbing for the bathroom sink after work to fix the forevermore slow drain. The fan in the bathroom sounds like it will blow up any day. Don't worry about the toilet seat. When it fell off last week I finally took care of it myself. The tags on the car expire the end of this month all it needs to pass safety and emissions are new tires, new tail light, new windshield, probably more that we just don't know about yet. Taxes, taxes, taxes. I have got to get the cool weather garden seeds in. There are all the regular things of the week going on RS, helping out in Garrett's classroom, his first soccer game, teaching Clare to crawl, Preston's tics are manifesting themselves once again, Scott's work, always work: Easel to complete and ship off. Drawings for friend's remodel to finish. Study for the LEED GA exam on Friday this week (work is paying for it, yeah). Regular 8 to 5 job without school this week. And Scott has decided he wants to be a Utah County Delegate. After all, school ends in five weeks and he will finally have more time to devote to one of his passions; making Provo a better place to live. So, if you live in precinct 14 in Provo vote for Scott.
Ya, Scott has loads of time, the washer is off his list, the bathroom sink, first chapter of the LEED book read, family night, it's only Monday!
The man is machine I tell ya.

The Fat White Lie!

2010-02-28T20:32:00.000-08:00

We had a health and fitness Relief Society activity in January where we learned how to make a drink with spinach, orange juice, frozen blueberries, frozen banana, and a mango. You can add up to 2 cups lightly packed spinach and your kids will drink it and not taste it. Promise. If you have a husband named Scott, he will not touch it, even if you assure him you can't taste the spinach.
I thought this was really quite childish of him to not even taste it.
I have been making it frequently over the last month adding ground flax different fruits etc. The other night I made the original version which is the best. The blueberry and orange juice completely mask the spinach. Scott asked if it had anything extra in it (code for spinach or avocado) I flat out lied and said, "no." I am not a good lier. I wanted to know if he would be able to detect the foreign spinach matter. He drank the whole thing, thinking it was a smoothie, and still does not know any different. He rarely reads my blog so this will be my secret for awhile, until he starts noticing Popeye muscles.

Backyard Chickens

2010-02-24T13:37:00.000-08:00

I was pleasantly surprised to see that one of the "new girls" laid her first egg today. I was hoping one of them would be a blue egg layer.
I realize my photo doesn't do it justice. I am unable at this point in my life to allow myself the luxury of experimenting with photography.

Valentine's Day

2010-02-14T23:05:00.000-08:00

Scott's take on Valentine's Day. You love those you love all year long not just on one day of the year. Scott doesn't get into the fussiness of the day. I do some years and some years not. This year was some year for heart shaped pancakes, strawberry sauce, and whipped cream for breakfast. Our traditional king crab legs, artichokes, and a chocolate mousse pie for dinner.
Preston has been having a lot of "this is the best day ever" days of late. Today was one of them. As usual he found a way to turn his food into something to play with and sat at the table long after everyone had finished. How many different weapons can you turn crab pincers into?He asked me if my mom worked (outside the home) while I was growing up. When I told him she stayed home and took care of me and my siblings he responded, "that means she was the best mom ever, like you!" I can't tell you how much this meant to me. To hear that my little boy express why he loves me being home with him. I am fortunate in that I enjoy staying home, and that Scott makes it possible for me to be home. Our arrangement works for us. I love my family.
I love Scott who shows his love everyday and not just on that "One" day.

Crawling

2010-02-08T20:03:00.000-08:00

She makes a beautiful "Rubens".

Our kids like to take their time when it comes to certain "Developmental Milestones". Clare has been throwing fits when she ends up on her belly and can't move. Today Scott put some cheerios in front of her and she launched off with her toes. Amazing!
Her belly has been obstructing her movement for months.

Finally!

2010-01-28T11:00:00.000-08:00

Our computer has had issues for FIVE long days. Scott, The Man, finally got the internet working again. Church callings are so time consuming without it. Especially when one is living within their means and cell phones are a luxury item. Speaking of living within ones means. After every baby I struggle with the dilemma of buying clothes that fit, or suffering through, back down to my normal size. I have always had one pair of pants for months on end and a few shirts, one skirt. I hate the thought of wasting money on a size I don't want to be.
Last week the happy day came when I tried on my normal size and miraculously the pants zipped and buttoned. I have been working my butt off, pun intended, so I have more than one pair of pants to wear. And of course the best benefit of all, the way I feel. Oh, happy day.

Friends

2010-01-21T09:06:00.000-08:00

Ezra and Preston talk ALL DAY LONG when they are together. This was a tiny portion of their hilarious all day conversation.

E-Preston do you know what? My dad gave me a pink cup at breakfast. I told him I didn't want a pink cup, and he said that is what you get!
P-That's weird.
E-And do you know what? Sometimes my dad wears a pink shirt to work!
P-Why would a grown up boy wear a pink shirt? That's so weird.
E-My dad says he likes some pink shirts.
P-Did you know Aidan doesn't even like the color pink?

the pink conversation continued and flowed into others about cool movies and legos and superheroes............................

Humanity

2010-01-21T08:05:00.000-08:00

While on my walk I passed my favorite shoe store on Center. There were bags and boxes of shoes piled all around the entrance I went inside to query. More bags and boxes EVERYWHERE! Then I saw the sign SHOES FOR HAITI. Emotion overcame me.

As I continued on my way, I did a double take,

Was that really Victoria? It's been several years since I have seen her. It's been 10 years since she told me some convoluted story about needing money for a nights stay at The Hotel Roberts. Once again she asked for money. A hard life of whoring and drugs, she continues on. A living testament to the resiliency of the human body. Victoria

SS Diarrhea Mom

2010-01-11T18:54:00.000-08:00

I overheard the boys conniving calling me naughty names after they both ended up in time out. I was having the hardest time not laughing as I listened from the kitchen.
Mean, Mean, stinky, stinky, stink, Mom. No, No, Garrett she is the SS Diarrhea Mom. Yes, folks, I am the meanest, stinkiest, SS Diarrhea Mom that ever lived!

Glasses

2010-01-06T22:52:00.000-08:00

My glasses have been sitting skewampus for some time now on my face. I couldn't get the mini screw to tighten. I have been suffering all kinds of maladies due to this issue. Constantly pushing my glasses up like the proverbial "nerd" only to have them fall a few seconds later. Handyman figured out the problem and now they sit squarely on my face once again. Praise Buddah! So glad I married Scott.

Happy New Year!

2010-01-02T21:18:00.000-08:00

We kissed on the front porch this year at midnight.
Before the kids I used to beg Scott to walk down to center street with me and watch the fireworks and festivities. He preferred to stay home while I went alone (sad huh!). He went with me Garrett's first New Years Day and ever since then we sleep. This year was promising to be the same until I heard the rental furnace acting up. I watched the repairman fix the problem it was having a few years ago and knew we needed to fix it before it burned up. I woke up the handyman and we repaired together. While we were at it, we repaired the leaking kitchen sink too, and what do you know 11:45 p.m.
We got the sparkly from cellar, sat on the newly delivered phone books (does anyone use those anymore?) on the front porch, and watched and listened to the celebrations going on around us.
So nice.

Competition

2009-12-29T21:16:00.000-08:00

I was once the center of Clare's little world. Not so anymore. She has taken to lunging for Scott whenever he is in her sight. As I tucked the boys in bed after Scott, Preston said he liked me a little bit the best.
Unusual, Everyone always likes Scott the best, including me.

Color, Cut, Style

2009-12-26T23:41:00.000-08:00

I can hide it no longer. I have put off coloring my hair too long. Dreading the day when it would be one more thing I needed to fit into my life. Scott says I should let it go. He thinks it is beautiful, it shows the mature woman I am becoming. I am lucky to have a sister in law who cuts my hair each time she comes to visit. This visit she gave me a very nice Christmas present by sharing her talent.
Thanks Jenn. I love it! And it wasn't the ordeal I have always imagined, coloring my hair.

Christmas

2009-12-26T23:00:00.000-08:00

Best Christmas EVER! according to Preston. He woke up the day before Christmas and shouted to Garrett, who was still sleeping, "Garrett! one more day until Christmas!"
Their requests were simple. Garrett asked Santy for a model balsa wood airplane. Preston (trickier) a real light saber that glows and makes the humming noise and a tiny car that has a light inside. We painted the headlights of a small car so it glows in the dark and Uncle Ryan saved the day with the light saber. He had one from a costume party years ago.
They played all day with their legos from Grandma and Grandpa. Aunt Laurie sent a box filled with nice little gifts for each of us, tulip bulbs for me, yeah. We are so fortunate to live by family. Christmas Eve spent at Scott's brothers with cousins. Christmas Day with Uncle Jeff and Aunt Danielley. The day after with all the Utah Isom's and Ryan's family, in Logan. A wonderful Christmas indeed.

Regrets

2009-12-21T19:42:00.000-08:00

Whenever I make a post baring my innermost feelings. I worry so much about offending. Why do I post such things then? What is this need for some of us to express ourselves so openly?
Well, just so you know there are times when I love Cheesewhiz over Mexican food. Packets of Lipton cup o' soup. A Costco dog. Gorton's fish sticks. Good food isn't always expensive or difficult to make. I love simple creamy polenta with an over easy egg on top. Spring lettuce with oil and vinegar. One of my favorite places to eat, El Salvador, on Center in Provo, has some of the most wonderful humble food. A papusa $1.60 that comes with a cabbage salad. And of course a plate of rice and beans to go with it for a few dollars. I love when people care enough to cook for me weather it is exquisite or not.
I AM disappointed when food is trying to be what it is not: Catch of the day flown in daily, when it is farm raised. Molten Lava cake created from a cake mix. Seasonal vegetables out of season. The imposters make the food snob in me come out.

Please don't stop feeding me.

Food Snob

2009-12-20T20:01:00.000-08:00

Call me ungrateful, call me a snob, call me what you wish, but I was sad when I found out Scott's work Christmas party would not be at the Stein Eriksen lodge this year in Park City. I look forward to it every year. The food is incredible the desserts perfect and the company great. This year it was the company that made the Christmas party. Isn't that just the way it should be?
But of course when one thinks about food all day, as I do, it is hard not to think about how the food one is eating could be better. Calories should not be wasted on farm raised fish (it is mushy and void of vital flavors), grain fed beef, marginal vegetables, the desserts at best were icebox. I laughed when I read under "Fish" catch of the day flown in daily. The waitress confirmed what I suspected when I asked if it was wild caught.
I read Ruth Reichl, "The Secret Life of a Food Critic in Disguise" a few years ago. Towards the end of the book she is on a subway going home thinking of the food she had just eaten and writing a review in her head. She is ripping the restaurant apart and the food and feeling snobby when she notices a homeless man. She gives him her leftovers and then begins to think about how we go to restaurants eat and give a review to friends, co-workers etc. We talk about how the food was awful, or too this or that. But, was the food really awful? I mean could you not eat it? Was it rotten?
I always think of this when I am ripping on a restaurant, prepackaged food, farm raised fish, eggs not from my chickens, or food not grown in my own backyard. Is it really not edible? No it's just that I am a Food Snob. There, I admit it. Oh, the torture I will endure (as my mom did) if I have to eat institutionalized food someday, daily. What a blessed life I live if that will be torture for me. Food is such a huge part of my day. I derive such pleasure from growing it, making it, eating it, serving it. It is my outlet, my way to create.
It is just hard for me to see time, money, and waste go into less than wonderful food. I get as worked up about poor quality food as Scott does about poor design.
We are one great match in a mediocre Restaurant.

Tea Party

2009-12-16T21:08:00.000-08:00

Clare and her Sassy Pants Sistas having tea.

Sighing

2009-12-09T19:45:00.000-08:00

Preston walked into the kitchen and asked why I was going like this........
He proceeded to imitate me sighing.
I then realized I had been sighing a lot. I am thankful I will no longer be a single parent next week while he is on Christmas break. And in about 5 months Scott will be done with school. No more 5:00 a.m. mornings making lunch and sometimes dinner to pack in his school bag. I feel for him especially this week as he rides to the bus stop in the snow and cold. This semester has passed so quickly on days like today though I am ready to give up. I am so proud of Scott for sticking with it. He is the one that is really sacrificing.

Breath Holding Spells

2009-12-01T20:05:00.000-08:00

That is what it is called. Unusual for an eight month old but sometimes starts as early as six months. That is about when I noticed it for the first time with Clare. Different from a seizure because they turn a bluish purple before they pass out. They typically outgrow it by four to six years of age. I hope I never see it again.
I am so thankful for modern medicine. The other night I made it to the after hours care clinic with Clare one minute before they closed. She woke up croupy and I knew if I didn't take her then we would be going to the E.R. in the middle of the night. After a dose of steroid and a breathing treatment we were sent home. The boys had croup every year until last year. Looks like Clare will follow. There are so many common childhood illnesses that kids died from 100+ years ago all day long. I feel so fortunate to have the aide of modern medicine.

Doctor

2009-11-29T21:02:00.000-08:00

My sister just called concerned about Clare's episodes. I will talk with her Doctor to make sure something serious isn't going on.

Clare

2009-11-29T20:19:00.000-08:00

I have heard of babies who work themselves up into such a fit they stop breathing and pass out. So, when Clare did this for the first time a few months ago I was scared of course but knew she was o.k. She has the croup and is not her usual happy easiest baby in the world self. Today while eating her breakfast she began her workup. I took her out of her chair and asked her to please not pass out with a mouth full of food. She didn't listen, turned blue and passed out. I swiped her mouth fearing her inhalation when it came would suck her food in her lungs. She is so limp and calm when she comes to. Scott and the boys witnessed her freaky episode twice this morning. I saw it another THREE times today. Passing out FIVE times in one day! That can't be good for the brain.

Thanksgiving

2009-11-22T21:25:00.000-08:00

Jamie is a wonderful Foodie Friend of mine. She made Thanksgiving dinner for us a few weeks ago. We cooked all day and enjoyed a dinner, with much Thanks, in front of the fire that evening. For great recipes go HERE.

2009-11-19T21:29:00.000-08:00

I received this email from Lands End. It made me cry. I thought of all those homeless people that I knew so well on my mission in Boston.

Big Boston Warm Up

2009-11-19T21:00:00.000-08:00

Time

2009-10-12T21:01:00.000-07:00

I don't have time to cut my own fingernails. Why would I have time to post?

Do What Teacher Says!

2009-09-15T19:50:00.000-07:00

Garrett was no where to be found after school today. Our neighbor had looked everywhere, she called asking me if I knew where he would be. I was a little panicky imagining the worst. His bike was there. 30 minutes later still no Garrett. A few minutes later she called to tell me she found him.

When he came home he was so excited about the snack he got in the gym. WHAT? Honey, where did you go?
I was in the gym Mom.
Why?
My teacher told me I was supposed to go there.
Why?
I don't know. It was fun Mom. We were reading and had a snack.
Garrett we were worried about you. You are supposed to meet Karen after school to go home.
Well Mom, my teacher told me to go to the gym.

around in circles it went. He is still having a hard time believing me that she made a mistake and he is NOT in the after school program.

Teachers have very powerful influences on the children in their classroom.

Dream

2009-08-29T20:16:00.000-07:00

When the house next door went up for sale last year I was filled with sadness knowing our most fabulous neighbors would be moving. We had great things going: Always a back and forth child swap, pre-school for Preston and Ezra, always a friend across the fence adult or child, sharing food, movies, stories, a date night each week, all we had to do was carry the bathed and fed, sleeping children home. We had the best back and forth give and take relationship right next door. I could leave Preston there while I took Garrett to school. Clare was carried next door in her baby moses to sleep while I ran a quick errand. We could always depend on one another to care for each other no matter what time of day or night. Christmas included. Those relationships are hard to come by. Especially when all parties involved like each other. And to have it right next door is almost asking too much. They brought more joy to our lives.

There was hopeful talk of them buying the house so we could remain neighbors. That fell through. I was bitter anytime someone came to look at the house. No one could be as good as the Wingets.

A few weeks ago I dreamt a nice young couple bought the house and I was happy.

The following morning, a nice young couple was at our door enquiring about the neighborhood. Mind you none of the others who came to look at the house asked the neighbors about the neighborhood. Why would you buy a house without asking your future neighbors about the neighborhood??????

Fortunately the Wingets found a more suitable home a short bike ride away. We are still able to do things together througout the week, and await the day, when the stars align, and we share a yard once more. Someday......................

........... that nice young couple, who showed up on our porch several weeks ago, bought the house, and moved in today. The bitterness is gone.

11 lbs. 3 oz.

2009-08-10T11:58:00.000-07:00

Clare and I have worked even harder since the beginning of July trying to get her to gain weight. She loves her brown rice cereal, oatmeal, bananas, avocados, and sweet potatoes. All that pumping and nursing every two hours paid off. I proudly announce she is on the charts now! In the second percentile for weight. 61st and 68th percentile for head circumference and length. I am no longer waking her in the night to eat and she sleeps from 10:00 p.m. to 6:00 a.m. lucky me, I earned an easy baby after those boys. It took about four years after becoming pregnant with Garrett for me to get 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep. If Clare is so lucky to have great wild hair like Preston and Garrett's, I think we might fix it a little more often than just on Sunday.

She takes a bottle now and will still nurse and loves her thumb. She rolled over last week, loves her fish, and adores the attention Garrett and Preston shower on her. We worked hard to get a crease in her leg and the double chin.

We love our little Skinny and proudly call her little Fatso.

Overactive Imagination

2009-07-28T08:25:00.000-07:00

Scott took the boys camping last week. They were crazy all day with excitement. I was crazy all day with the excitement of a night and a morning all to myself with Clare and sewing. A simple dinner of garden beets.

As I was falling asleep I saw their faces in my mind, would they be warm enough? Would the gallon of water be enough? Scott a minimalist as well, wouldn't pack more than necessity. The scoffing at my suggestion to get the whistles out of the 72 hour kits for them, (I never had a whistle when I camped as a boy!). What if Scott had a heart attack? Would they know how to get out by themselves? What if a bear smelled the hotdog on them? Did he remember the gun? What if.......................................

All too soon I heard the floors creak as Scott entered the house, carrying their tired smokey bodies to bed at 11:00 p.m. He packed the rain fly instead of the tent. Woops! My boys were safe.

Humidity in Utah?

2009-07-02T13:51:00.000-07:00

Definitely lettuce weather this summer. Rain most every day in June and now into July. My garden has only had to be watered a few times since I began planting in March.
I have never felt such humidity in Utah. When the sun is out it feels like a New England summer.

ASS

2009-06-30T22:17:00.000-07:00

I heard Preston spelling A*S*S over and over outside. Then shouting ASS, ASS, ASS to himself. He told me he learned it from Home Alone (he saw it months ago at Christmas). He thought it was a great word until I taugh him what a poor quality, uneducated, crass word it is.
While eating my birthday cake on the front porch tonight we saw the police chase a car into the drive across the street. Scott instantly was on the chase for the suspects, in bare feet (I am proud he likes to help the law, but I worry EVERY time he does it). I shooed the boys into the house while we watched through the window and they asked questions.
"Is Dad going to get the bad guys"
"When can I chase the bad guys with Dad"
"How old is an adult"
"Mom are the police chasing them because they said ASS and HELL"

Once again Scott's eyes, that never miss a detail, located the "Bad" guy hiding in the bushes. An exciting bedtime story was had tonight as Scott reenacted the chase.

Clare Laughs

2009-06-29T06:32:00.000-07:00

Preston just wants his best friend Ezra to come and play today. He was on the verge of tears when he found out this morning that he can't come over today. Little Clare, with belly full of milk, smiled at Preston and said she would play with him today. She might even give him a full belly laugh today like she did TWICE last week for her favorite Garrett.

8 LBS 6 OZS

2009-06-16T22:56:00.000-07:00

Preston has had an awful snotty nose for 3 months now. It started in March with an ear infection, turned strep, then cold, then allergies? We were at the pediatricians every other week it seemed. As I was talking to the pediatrician about his illnesses I told her I hadn't given him the antibiotic for the strep 2 + months prior because he had just ended a round for the ear infection and he seemed to be doing better the next day. He got over it on his own . I found out that not giving a child antibiotics for strep could lead to heart damage, kidney failure, and blood disorders. That's when I started crying. I had scrappy Clare who is ready to be labeled "failure to thrive" and Snot of 3 months Preston who could have been seriously damaged. Can you say, Crap Mom!"

Sue Ann and her assistant did their best to console me and tell me "we know many Moms are worried about giving their children too many antibiotics, ya, ya". I still felt crap.

So Preston was prescribed an antibiotic for sinusitis and is finally snot free. Seriously, 3 months of every 10 to 30 minutes blowing his insides out. Bad, really bad.

And little, little Clare bear what to do about her? I finally called La Leche League and was given the advice to stop supplementing with formula. No binkies, no bottles, nurse every one and half to 2 hours. Skin to skin contact, co sleeping (although this was said in a hush, hush, way). I tell ya there is so much advice on what to do and not do raising babies and everyone has their opinion on what works and doesn't work. Now with my third I finally realize every child is so different. You do what works for you.

La Leche Julie came over that night with more information for me and talked with Scott and I for a long time. As she left, she looked at Scott and said, "Scott right?" He replied, "Julie". They then began talking about a date they went on high school. Funny, no? His friend from high school giving me breast feeding advice.

Julie I thank you a thousand times over, because it is working. She has gained 3 ounces in 5 days. She was at an 1/8 of an ounce a day. Progress!

I have read scheduling books "Healthy sleep habits, Happy Child", "Babywise". These are looked down on by La Leche. La Leche is demand feeding. Well Clare doesn't demand. I still have to wake her to eat. She likes to sleep, my genes (that is half our problem she doesn't wake to eat and it has been too easy for me to let her sleep too long between feedings). La Leche says breast milk is digested in 1 1/2 hours. Scheduling books say 2 1/2 to 3 hours between feedings. When I told my pediatrician what I am doing she said, "I am glad that is working for you, that doesn't work for all women." She said it is hard to maintain quality and quantity when feeding that often. La Leche says that quantity stays up when feeding that often and that quality is the same. Qauntity is certainly up for me especially since I stopped the formula. So who is right? For me it is La Leche for another mother and baby it might be different. From this I have learned there are guidlines to child rearing but much is a guessing game.

I am hoping I have finally figured it out with Clare and she continues to gain. Wishing myself and all of you LUCK.

No Carpet Ever Please!

2009-06-15T21:13:00.000-07:00

Preston just ran from his bed into our room, passing the bathroom on the way. By the time I had detached Clare and ran to our bedroom the stream of pee was ending. He stood there in a daze as I laughed. He skirted the puddle and ran right back to bed. I love wood floors, a quick damp towel to the floor and done.

Backyard Chickens

2009-06-01T20:14:00.000-07:00

Garrett used to say he wanted to be a farmer when he grew up. I took great pride in this thinking it was from the time we spend together in the garden. At 18 months he was helping me harvest potatoes with his chubby hands putting them into the wire storage basket.

Now he is the main caretaker of the chickens. When they escape (usually from me forgetting to close the door at night) he magically woos them back into the coop. They love him and let him carry them around. We are proud of his chicken caretaking skills.

When they began producing more eggs than we could use Scott encouraged him to call a friend to see if they would like to buy the eggs. No answer from the friend. He really wanted to earn $2.00. I wasn't paying attention to what he was doing when he got out the ward directory and began calling another friend. A fine proper British woman. I heard Garrett say in a gruff voice, "DO YOU WANT TO BUY SOME EGGS?" This friend was at work and thought it was a practical joke. I quickly figured out who he had called and had him tell her who he was and why he was selling eggs. He takes his egg selling business seriously.

We decided to get six chicks to replace some of our older hens. Three disappeared within the first week. Animal, neighbor kids, escaping the coop? Garrett took it hard.

What happened today was hardest of all.

We had friends over, he got out the 3 remaining chicks for the friends to see. Kids inevitably begin chasing them as they try to catch them. Poor little Fea"d"er Feet (Feather Feet) was stepped on. Garrett was sobbing as he came to tell me. The poor bird looked awful. I had to take her in the back yard and put an end to her misery.

I grew up on a farm accustomed to animal death. From cats caught in the combine, calves dying from scours. The devil cat that attacked humans, that had to meet its end. Death on the farm was routine.

My stomach churned knowing I had to end this chicks life.

We sat on the back steps as he asked me if she would be resurrected. When would he see her again?

The funeral helped to ease the pain of her death. Sad day indeed.

7 LBS 9 OZ

2009-05-21T19:04:00.000-07:00

I almost cried at her two month checkup, when I saw she had only gained 2 lbs since leaving the hospital. She has had a hard time eating, from her nursing strikes after being given a bottle or binkie, to barely waking to eat. Up to week 7 or so.

I tried supplementing again after the doctors visit. She nursed first and then drank 3 0z. from a bottle I did this 3 times and she took 3 oz. each time (she didn't go on a nursing strike this time). I started to feel like the crappiest Mother thinking I had starved my baby until the following day when she had a hard time taking in more than an additional ounce after nursing. After pumping I realize I am producing enough for her. Everyone always talks about how they don't want to see their babies growing so big, lamenting the loss of the newborn stage. It's sweet and cute, such a tiny baby for so long, but also worrisome.

Prayers

2009-05-21T18:51:00.000-07:00

The boys prayers have become so sincere!

Preston's bedtime prayer tonight. "Heavenly Father, we are thankful for this day, we had a good day. Please bless me not to squish Clare and to be a better builder than Garrett, and to learn how to race cars on the race track faster. Please help me to be a good archeologist and a spy, and a fire truck driver." There were plenty more good phrases unfortunately I can't remember verbatim. He usually prays for things like being able to eat his food and to be good at building buildings and climbing trees etc.

Garrett prays to help Mom take good care of Clare. And for Dad to be safe coming home from Bluff and to not get in any car accidents. And daily to not have any nightmares. Hmmm that one must be working I can't remember when the last time he had a nightmare was.

Binkies

2009-05-15T21:12:00.000-07:00

They are magic. Garrett was soothed by it from day one. It took 4 to 5 months of me holding it in until Preston fell in love with it. They make church and bedtime so easy.

This little girl suffers from nipple confusion every time she has been given a binkie or a bottle. The worst was in the hospital when they asked me to supplement and then she wouldn't nurse. It was a struggle to get her to nurse again. If she is given a bottle or a binkie I pay for it by her not nursing anywhere from a day and a half (when she was 2 and 4 weeks) to several hours (now). Every week or two I try to introduce it again. I hate laying her down to cry herself to sleep. She's got it down now and it only takes a few minutes but I want to hold and cuddle her to sleep, or let the binkie work it's magic. She is like Preston, as a baby, and does not want to be cuddled to sleep. Sad, right? Preston has more than made up for it, he is the sweetest cuddly guy now.

After todays nursing strike I have sworn off trying the binkie again until she is at least 4 months. Have any of you had this problem? Oh, I love binkies. They are so wonderful. I am fortunate though and she sleeps well anyway, once she is asleep. She only wakes up once to eat in the night. She has always been a good sleeper. Too good, hence part of her weight gain issues. She is still so tiny, wearing newborn diapers and newborn onesies at two months.

Smile

2009-04-24T11:23:00.000-07:00

Clare gave me her first smile today. I cried.

Third Times A Charm!

2009-03-23T19:55:00.000-07:00

Sunday March 15th

I didn't feel her moving much in the night. That morning I couldn't stop thinking about her cord being pinched and never feeling her move again. Scott who never worries about anything said it was time to go. I quickly packed a bag, was given a blessing, we cried together, and left for the hospital with the boys. As soon as we walked in I started to cry. There was my fabulous Doctor (on call that weekend) in the reception area. I was given a non stress test while the boys ate snacks from a vending machine. After receiving an ultra sound where my amniotic fluid levels measured 3.9 cm. I was told I was staying. What a relief. The boys were taken to their adopted grandparents and I was given pitocen. I really wanted to know what a contraction felt like so I waited to get an epidural. I was given an epidural soon enough with both boys that I never knew if I was having a contraction or not. I was induced at almost 41 weeks with both of them. After 10 hours of mild contractions I finally felt a powerful one and they came quick and hard after that. I dilated from a 2 to a 10 in less than an hour. The epidural didn't kick in until it was too late. I loved my epidurals with the boys the needle going in (a tingling electrical sensation) never feeling any pain. I would never choose to feel labor pain. Epidural for me every time thank you. I had to work hard to push her out. The boys came so easily, a few pushes and I was done. Clare was a good 30 minutes of pushing and she was tiny (6lbs 3oz.).

She was born at 3:21 a.m. Monday, March 16th. Her best friend Chloe awoke talking and babbling at 3:30 a.m.
The hospital hotel was great as usual. I revel in my hospital stays. I learned my lesson after coming home early with Garrett to take advantage of the great babysitting and care from the nurses as long as your insurance will let you. It is a rare opportunity to be undisturbed by phone calls, visitors, family. I like to focus on my baby and nothing else after birth. Those two days are sacred to me. The room next to me was party room as one group of visitors after another passed through. As much as I love my Scotty and the boys I didn't even want them there.

We came home on Wednesday and the boys left to stay at their cousins. Scott and I had a wonderful day, just us at home. I was able to rest all day Thursday thanks to Aunt Rachel keeping the boys. We planned on having them go to my Brother's for the weekend until Preston got sick. We were concerned he had RSV because the neighbors have it. Scott dropped Clare and I off at the adopted Grandparents and brought Garrett and Preston home. We were so happy the following day when he tested negative for RSV (positive for strep). I didn't want to spend several days away from them although my stay at the Falgousts (adopted Grandparents) was so relaxing. I was able to sleep and sleep.

Since she was two weeks early my help won't be coing until this weekend. I am so lucky to have my older sister coming for 10 days and then Scott's Mom.

The boys have been so wonderful loving their little sister. She lay in bed with Garrett tonight as he was falling asleep and Preston loves to hold, kiss, touch her face, and draw pictures and build buildings for her.

I am so grateful to all the kind neighbors, family and friends who have brought us meals and offered help with the boys. We feel so loved and cared for.

And little Clare is sooooooo good. She eats and sleeps and only wakes to eat when I wake her up. She rarely ever cries. And if she is awake, it is in a drunken milk induced stupor. She has only awoken on her own to eat a handful of times. I believe she has been watching her best friend Chloe and learning from her how to be the best baby ever.

On Friday she weighed 5 lbs. 8 oz. I love her stick arms and legs and tiny, tiny, bony bum. It will all fill in too soon and I will have a plump little baby that can no longer be carried in the palm of my hand. I have never been a baby person but I am with Clare. I cannot stare and hold her enough.

Doing laundry is a joy finding her tiny socks, and yes, PINK is a nice color to find in the laundry.

Today

2009-03-09T20:41:00.001-07:00

Scott was able to go to the Dr. with me today, so nice. I love the way my doctor listens to my concerns, even when I tell him I had nightmares all night the night before about my baby not moving and being stillborn. He pauses for a long time as he is thinking and reading over my chart then gives me a second ultra sound to check the cord blood flow and heartbeat again. He says, "he never discounts a mothers intuition." And then he asks me to come back on Thursday instead of the following Monday validating my concern and letting me know that he is listening to my concerns. I am sure Clare will be just fine and even if I am being paranoid I still feel better knowing I am receiving great medical care. I was talking with a neighbor today about my Doctors visit and she asked if we have the same Doctor. Sure enough he saved her and her babies life when she was pregnant with her second. I tell ya, he is an incredibly busy doctor for good reason. He is good.

I have been making freezer food for after her birth. Today was turkey day. Tomorrow will be stock. I am beat, fortunately Scott and my sister are cleaning up the kitchen. I can't stand anymore.

I love my little boys. Yesterday in church we talked about Mothers. Preston was asked what do you like that your Mom does for you? "She makes me eggs sunnyside up." (Actually they are over easy but sunnyside up sounds better). My heart was full knowing how much he likes the eggs I make. They were given little chocolates with a note attached, "Mother's are treasures", to give to their Mom's. Garrett of course gave his to Scott, because really, Scott is the best. Of course Garrett loves me too but Scott is his favorite.

Musical Beds

2009-03-08T05:31:00.000-07:00

Scott arrived home late last night after being away for 2 weeks. We have been anxiously awaiting his return. Preston woke up around midnight needing juice. Odd as that has never been a middle of the night request. After drinking his juice and going to the bathroom he ran into our room, "I am sleeping with you tonight." The look on his face and the way he bound into Scott's arms as he snuggled up to him (not knowing he was home yet) was priceless. Those boys LOVE their Dad. I cannot sleep, in my state, with squirmy Preston in our bed. I woke up a few hours later in Preston's bed, when Garret jumped in next to me. He doesn't move when he sleeps so the twin worked for us for a few hours. Now here I am on the sofa. I must be getting that 2 weeks before you have the baby burst of energy that I have never had because I have been waking up very early, rested.

Shoes

2009-03-04T22:43:00.000-08:00

We have been fortunate and have been able to get all but about 4 pairs of shoes for Garrett (Preston of course wears the hand me downs) at yard sales. Very nice name brand shoes for a dollar or two. I searched through the shoe box for Preston with no luck this week. Garrett must have trashed that size. I have put off buying him shoes for too long, his rain boots need a rest. I promised them 4 rides on the escalator if they were good. 5 if they were extra good. After buying them both some new super fast shoes, they were super fast. My belly and I couldn't keep up with them. I waited at the bottom of the escalator and hoped security or someone else wouldn't reprimand me or the crazies as they took their four rides.

Lock?

2009-03-02T19:33:00.000-08:00

Preston grabbed a pantiliner, took the backing off, and handed it to me while I was going to the bathroom. We have no door knob on the bathroom door (one of the many things that still needs to be taken care of in our unfinished house). Last week while I was soaking in the tub he grabbed the shower brush and began scrubbing my back. "Mom do you like that?" The last two months he has wanted to be right by my side doing everything I am doing. Preston has always been autonomous, quite happy in his own little world. So this change in him, talking my ear off, helping me all day long etc. is unusual. Maybe he finally realizes Garrett is at school and he really has me all to himself.

Anyway, it's high time I was a little more modest around these boys. It's hard with one bathroom and a door that is always swinging open.

Good News

2009-02-23T20:07:00.000-08:00

Much needed good news today. Especially after reading horror stories of complications due to low amniotic fluid and placentas not functioning properly. Mr. Fabulous Dr. rechecked all measurements today. His measurements were different from the ultra sound tech measurements. Clare's abdomen is measuring in the 16th percentile. The amniotic fluid was up from 5cm to 8cm. Was it the bath soaks that helped? Well, it is up and that is the important thing. Eight centimeters is in the normal range. The cord blood flow looks good also. I left the office with a little spring in my step. So comforting to know that everything appears to be good.

I feel so fortunate have so many good people around me to help out when in need. Even when we are not in need. Thank you so much all of you for helping and offering help. I feel loved. The boys spent the afternoon with adopted Grandpa and were sad when they heard me come in to take them home. We are so lucky to have so many caring people surrounding us. Thanks.

The Baby

2009-02-20T12:10:00.000-08:00

My last 4 visits with my favorite Doctor have included a non stress test and ultrasound each time. Clare's abdomen has been measuring small and the amniotic fluid is low. Yesterdays was the visit to recheck all measurements and compare them with the measurements from 4 weeks ago. Her little belly has fallen off the charts. The concern is that the placenta is not working properly. Scott will have you all know I was born to worry. Really, I am sure she is o.k. there is just the nagging in the back of my mind. Every time I feel her kick or squirm I am assured she is o.k. My fabulous Doctor errs on the side of caution. He reassures me that we need to monitor her to make sure she is not the 1 in 100 that needs intervention.

Meanwhile I have been told to soak in the tub 20 minutes twice a day and rest a few hours in the morning and a few hours in the evening. How do I fit that in?

The Boys

2009-02-11T18:51:00.000-08:00

P- Mom I want to sit in your lap for stories.

S- I wish you could, but my lap is full with Clare.

P- Mom when Clare comes out, I don't want you to have anymore babies. Just 3 kids.

S- Why Preston? Because I don't want anymore babies hogging your belly.

S- Neither do I!

I was so tired last night I went to bed with them at 7:30. Garrett massaged my back for 24 minutes.

G- Mom remember when you felt so sick you had to lay on the sofa and couldn't move? And I massaged your back to make you feel better?

That was months ago before I even knew I was pregnant. The things these boys remember.

Preston fell asleep in Garrett's lap while Garrett massaged his head.

My boys melt my heart.

Found a Great Blog

2009-02-08T20:42:00.000-08:00

In searching for quality cotton gowns for those first few months of baby's life I found this tutorial on make your own out of men's T-shirts. I wish I could have made gowns like this for the boys. I am so excited to make some for Clare.

The majority of her sewing projects are made from yard sale and thrift store finds. She recycles clothes and fabrics in the way I like to and want to. I love her shopping bags made from vintage sheets. She is one creative woman.

Pink

2009-02-03T19:19:00.000-08:00

When I was seven I had a pretty light Pink fluffy dress. I also had some Pink pajama bottoms. A few years ago something possessed me to buy a Pink shirt that I quite liked. These are the only Pink clothing items I can ever remember wearing.

My non Pink liking friends swear to me that I will dress my little girl in Pink and like it. Hmmmm? I much prefer Red, Brown, Blue, Green, Orange, Yellow, White.

Package

2009-02-03T14:14:00.000-08:00

As Garrett and I walked home from kindergarten, I was feeling irritated by his nose pickin' coughing into hands classmates. Who is the brilliant one that deemed it polite to cough into your hands and then touch everything that everyone else touches? I taught the germ spreaders how to cough into their elbows today. Last week I didn't help out in his class because of the nightmares I had the night before about contracting some illness from one of his nose picking, coughing classmates and it harming Clare. I was just having a cranky morning in general.

I saw a package on the porch upon arriving home for Clare Bingham. I wondered who would be sending a package for Scott's Dad (Clair)? I smiled when I realized it was for the squirming being in my belly. Tears came to my eyes when I saw the beautiful white knit sweater dress and RED shoes for Clare to grow into. My day was much happier from then on. Thanks RyJen.

Tooth Fairy

2009-01-28T14:56:00.000-08:00

Wiggle, Wiggle, Wiggle, "Mom Look!" I must say I was pretty proud. My 5 year old lost his first tooth. His best friend said, "I got $5.oo when I lost my first tooth. Scott looked at me as if to say, "oh, great can we give anything less now." We told him if he lost his two loose teeth this week we would match what the Tooth Fairy gives him. Since his permanent teeth are already in right behind. I let Garrett know that because we are in a recession he shouldn't expect to get five dollars. Fully planning on giving him a Dollar.
I recieved a dime as a child, maybe a quarter. I am the one who rarely indulges the children. Scott on the other hand has a harder time. I saw the $5.00 Scott laid out for him before we went to bed and laughed. How could he let the Tooth Fairy give someone else 5 and his own child anything less? Somehow that 5 turned into 6 by morning. And then $12.00 with our match. Scott is a softy.

Soup

2009-01-12T20:00:00.000-08:00

I enrolled Garrett in some after school programs. When I picked him up from his Spanish Arts and Crafts class today he was so excited about a dinner and dance an hour later that his teacher told him the family was invited to. I was hoping to have them in bed early and really didn't want to go. He insisted it would be so much fun AND they were having dinner. "Come on MOM." I finally said o.k. knowing full well I would be sorely disappointed with the processed food I knew would be served. We sat down to white bread bowls and Velveeta cheese and bits of broccoli soup. Garrett was stunned. They told him at school that they were going to have really good food at this "Party". When my boys see soup they RUN. After episodes of throwing up their dinner I no longer even try to get them to eat soup. Scott has made up a story about two monkeys Sharpie and Gummy. Sharpie only eats meat and Gummy only eats lentil soup. In the end of each story Gummy always tricks Sharpie into eating lentil soup of some form which Sharpie promptly spits out or throws up.

The mother of the family sitting across from us tried to tell the boys how great the soup was, and see even her baby liked it. Lady thanks for being so kind but really none of us want to see vomit on the table. They ate some white bread and we left the joint. As we were leaving Garrett said, "Mom babies will eat anything, Right?"

Snowy Library Day

2008-12-23T14:39:00.000-08:00

I was wondering how I would get my walk in with both boys home. The snow is too deep for Garrett to ride his bike beside the jogger. The brilliant idea came to pull them in the sled. They loved it, laughing all the way there and back.

The library was great. No one there, huge movie selection, with everyone gone for the holidays. We came home with 8 thanks to Scott's library card also.

Clare

2008-12-22T21:14:00.000-08:00

She has been beating my insides today like no other. Things I am grateful for with Clare. I was only sick with her for the first 16 to 18 weeks. She has not given me daily bloody noses like the boys did. She does not require the constant eating the boys did. I can go more than 2 hours without eating and do not crave fast food. I have a decent amount of energy. I don't have to nap each day. Although naps are never a bad thing. I feel so much better this pregnancy and can understand now how some women love being pregnant. I am sure a lot of it has to do with the fact that I haven't gained the weight I did with the boys. I thank my walking friend Dasha for that. I hoped to run until at least 5 months but after about week 12 I was done. Dasha and I would see each other walking often and began walking together. She is pregnant also and our walking pace is the same. I have found it rare to find someone that fits your pace walking or running. She also doesn't mind the elements being from the Ukraine. I am very grateful for her. We keep each other going.

Clare thanks for allowing me to have one good pregnancy.

Neighbors

2008-12-10T20:37:00.000-08:00

We have the best neighbors in the world!!!!!!!! EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! don't even try to tell me yours are better than mine because you just can't beat the Joneses with these folks. In the year and a half that we have lived next to each other our lives have become so intertwined with food swapping, child rearing, date night swapping, chatting, helping, giving, taking, giving that I think I will die from depression the day we are no longer neighbors. When the landlord put for sale signs in their yard the realization that we might not be neighbors in the future loomed large. After months of no bites on the overpriced house, someone came to look at it today. I watched as they came and left, wishing I was bold enough, to be a crazy next door neighbor and scare them away.

T.V.

2008-12-02T21:17:00.000-08:00

Garrett informed me that we need a new T.V. Like the kind in the hotel that plays different shows all day. Not the kind you put movies into like our computer.

While at Disneyland last month the boys were in heaven watching T.V. They got frustrated though when it wouldn't pause to go to the bathroom or fast forward or rewind. We laughed as we explained commercials to them.

When we bought our house 8 years ago there was never time to watch T.V. and never has been since. People have tried to give us T.V.'s but we would never have time to watch it. Sorry Garrett.

Thanksgiving

2008-11-30T21:53:00.001-08:00

Several years ago Scott and I ate Thanksgiving dinner with our friends Jaime and Dan. Since then I have made the same spinach gratin, cranberry sauce, and cranberry cornbread stuffing that she made. You would never find on Jaime's table anything made from a box or can, just the way I like it. The dinner was divine therefore I try to recreate it every year.

I took these same dishes to dinner at my brother's for Thanksgiving this year. Of course it was fabulously created by my sister in law Ally. Alyssa made sure there was no shortage of pies and the boys were taken care of by their cousins.

This was the most relaxing Thanksgiving we have had in years. Scott was able to work on his project for school (bunkbeds for the boys) before we left for dinner and I finished up my creations that I had started the day before.

I love the age the boys are at. They are still little and malleable but also independent. Allowing me the time for my kitchen creations.

Friday I started my own Turkey making process. First I begin with at least a 4 hour brine in a salt bath. Then dry it off, let the skin dry for at least 8 hours on a rack at 40 degrees or less then butter baste it. Fill the cavity with onion, carrots, thyme, and, celery. More onion, carrots, thyme and celery with 1 cup of water in the roasting pan. Set V rack into roasting pan. Simple truss the 12 to 14 lb. bird. Roast on 400 degrees for 45 minutes on the back side. 15 minutes on each leg side. And last 30 to 45 minutes on breast side until thermometer registers 160 degrees in thick part of breast. I pull the bird out a few degrees sooner because it continues to cook as it rests on the counter the 20 minutes before you slice it. Turkey had never failed me when I cook it this way.

Saturday we ate Thanksgiving once again with the bird I cooked. The boys insisted we put up Christmas after being at their friends house. It is easy to see the progress of our children when I think back to Holidays in past years. This year they helped me get down our 2 boxes of Christmas (I am a minimalist). They carried them into the house, helped fluff our Charlie Brown tree and put the ornaments on. They slept by the tree last night and are sleeping there tonight. We also got out the package of Christmas books that have been high on their shelf in the closet. Waiting for this time of year to be opened. They have been pouring over them for two days now.

I love the excitement they bring to our home.

The Ultrasound

2008-11-13T11:49:00.000-08:00

In March of 2000, Scott and I were eating lunch in this plaza in Spain, when he drew this sketch. A mother and her teenage daughter were eating at a table across from us. As I watched them I became a little emotional thinking how nice it would be to have a daughter someday. I have had many episodes since then. Watching my sister with her daughters. Seeing certain girl clothes or watching Tea' in church with her two older brothers. I almost started crying a few days ago when my friend took the hat off her daughters head and her braids came tumbling out. I have hoped for years I would be able to experience the mother daughter relationship.

When I was pregnant with Garrett I was sure I was having a girl. The day of the ultrasound a beautiful four year old boy came into my work with his mother. As I helped them I kept getting the impression that I needed to prepare myself for boy. And sure enough a few hours later I found out it was a boy. With our second child I was sure once again that I was having a girl. Again, the day I went in for the ultrasound I had the same impression that I needed to prepare for a boy.

There are those who just know what they are having or even have dreams and see their child in a dream. For several years I have had the image of a little girl in my head that looks like Scott with blue eyes and wavy brown hair she is about 6 or 7. And, for 15 years Scott and I have had a named picked out for this girl. Clare was a sweet little girl in my primary class in Washington and it is also Scott's Dad's name. I am excited to see if our little Clare does end up looking like this image I have of her. We have waited a long time for you sweetie and are so excited that you are coming to our home soon. We love you! Well, Garrett was a little disappointed that you wouldn't be the third boy in the family but Preston changed his mind weeks ago and is happy to know you are coming.

Phone Call

2008-11-11T20:59:00.000-08:00

He was dead. I knew it! I awoke around 1:00 a.m. Scott wasn't home. He drove to school and was supposed to be home around 10:00 p.m. A gang had beaten him up in the parking lot of the school.... He was broken down on the side of the road and a murderer stopped to help him.... He was in a car accident.... He was lying in the an emergency room somewhere.... THAT NAUGHTY BOY kept thinking, as he was working on a group project at school, "I'll call in 10 minutes, she's asleep anyway." I ended up calling his co-worker who had a class with him that day. I felt terrible waking them up at 1:30 in the morning but I was beside myself. I was sobbing, shaking, planning out my life without him. I still feel the pains of it today. His co worker said he would drive to school to look for him. Then the NAUGHTY one called soon after. Scott has always been the kind of person who doesn't call. He gets too wrapped up in his work or school project and puts it off until I know he is dead. He hasn't done this in years. Neither one of us wants to get a cell phone for multiple reasons but, I think the NAUGHTY one has just forced us to.

I can sympathize with trying to find a moment to call especially when working against a deadline with a group of people counting on your help. I have been trying to squeeze into my day, calling the bike trailer company, to order a new wheel for the trailer when it is used as a stroller. Finally, today after weeks of waiting for a moment of quiet I called and began to order the part when I hear Preston wailing up the stairs. I told the guy on the phone sorry but he was going to hear screaming soon when my little boy found me. He laughed 30 seconds later and said you were right. I quickly grabbed the container of Halloween candy and set it on the floor in front of the boys and their friend. Whew! I was able to continue. Preston had smashed his fingers in the door. There is always something. A bum to wipe. Food to get. A conflict to resolve. A door to answer. Crayons to find. My time has become very limited again since I got pregnant. I have to take a nap or I can't function and Scott is rarely available because of work and school. We are muddling through quite nicely though when all is taken into consideration. Especially when we compare it to his undergraduate time. Only 5 more weeks this quarter.

Waste Not Want Not

2008-11-04T22:27:00.000-08:00

My Mom was born during the latter part of the Great Depression. We siblings still laugh about the car being screeched to a halt on the highway to pick up onions, corn, potatoes, etc. that had fallen off harvesting trucks, as children. I would get so irritated with her, saving EVERYTHING. Even when her multiple sclerosis kept her from walking much she still drove into the orchard by our house, and crawled to pick up the fallen fruit from the trees. She hated to see things go to waste.

Provo and Orem were once covered with orchards. We still have some of the remains. This fall, I notice especially, as I walk the streets and see all the chestnuts, walnuts, asian pears, many varieties of apples, and pears, and remember the fallen fruits of earlier months I am saddened by the waste. I think of those who planted the trees as a means of survival or supplementing their food supply.

As I picked pears and apples today with cousin Stan he talked about documenting all the waste. He said, I don't understand, with food prices going up and talk of recession, people losing their jobs etc. and still people don't use this fruit.

I am thankful my Mom taught me to harvest asparagus in the early spring from the orchards and by the "bottomless" pond. She taught me how to glean the fields after the potato and onion harvesters left. We were in the orchards half the summer picking apricots, cherries, peaches, nectarines, plums, pears, apples. She had her sources for all kinds of nuts, fruits, and vegetables. This spring as I picked the pigsweed or lambsquarter (depending on where you are from) in my garden I cried thinking of her and all she taught me. I distinctly remember being in the garden with her, showing me the silvery underside of the leaf, telling me it grows wild and is very nutritious. My Isom ancestors supposedly lived off of it their first summer in southern Utah.

Even though potatoes, and onions were pennies a pound at the time we scavenged them from the highway I see the wisdom now in my Mom teaching us to be self reliant. I can feed my family quite well, even during hard times from what she taught me.

Gratitude

2008-10-28T18:57:00.001-07:00

I am thankful for water that always runs clean from the tap. I am thankful for a washing machine and dryer. I am very thankful for wood floors that are so easy to clean vomit up from at 3:30 a.m. I am thankful for 5 year olds who learn quickly the sensation of what it feels like to throw up and make it to the toilet or bowl the next four times in the middle of the night. I am thankful for a husband who is so full of compassion for the sick one that he sleeps on the floor beside our bed with his arms wrapped around him. I am thankful I am able to stay at home with my boys and care for them.

Conversations

2008-10-21T19:19:00.000-07:00

P- "Aunt Kimm do you know why my Mom's belly is so fat?"

K- "Why?"

P- "Because she's going to have a baby."

While on a recent shopping trip I was really stocking up. I even let the boys have several items I rarely ever buy (cheetos, spidey man mac and cheese from a box, marshmallows, get it). Oh were they pleased. I couldn't even say no to Garrett begging for the crappy grocery store sushi.

G- "Mom we sure are buying a lot of stuff. Do we have enough money for all this? Good thing Dad is at work."

Like Scott always says, especially when its some great dumpster or yard sale find. "I do provide."

Yes you do sweet cheeks thanks!

Parenting

2008-10-12T14:59:00.000-07:00

The nightly routine is to pick up all toys and put them away. The boys were extremely tired last night and having a hard time cleaning up even with help. Scott told them, "no wrestling tonight unless everything is picked up in 8 minutes." We were both surprised and deeply saddened when they didn't beat the timer. The wailing and gnashing of teeth began. We ached for them but had to stick with the punishment. We sat down to eat dinner with the tear streaked boys. I said the prayer and started to cry as I prayed for them to understand and learn from this experience. Preston didn't understand why I was crying. Preston my boy I don't think you will understand how hard it is to punish you until you have children of your own.

Slang

2008-10-07T07:36:00.000-07:00

This time last year Garrett skidded to a stop in front of his friends house to ask him where he was going. His friend said, "The Library." Garrett's reply was, "SWeeeeet!" I almost died. I could never bring myself to use slang in Jr. High and High School. I was never comfortable with uttering more than a "cool" here or there. Over the course of this year the boys have learned some pretty "Awesome" words. I don't think it is that "Freakin Cool." When I heard "What the Heck" I almost put the cabosh on the whole slang business. Until I talked with my friend who suggested I let it go. So my boys speak Utah.

Nice Friend

2008-09-22T22:19:00.000-07:00

Someone REAL nice left a case of Dr. Pepper on my porch today. THANK YOU!

Dr. Pepper

2008-09-17T21:23:00.000-07:00

I have only had 5 this pregnancy. I am dying today. Really. There is so much to put up in the garden. I can barely keep up with the house let alone: Dry the plums, make pesto (crying shame not to have pesto in the winter) dry the chile peppers for kimchi powder, put up the tomatoes, freeze the peppers, zucchini, dig potatoes on and on. Good food is one of the most important things in my life and to let my garden go to waste is a sin. Oh! bless my friend who was at the store when I called and promptly brought over the beverage that makes all my sickness go away. How does this carbonated, HFCS drink make all my problems go away?

Only When Pregnant

2008-09-03T19:36:00.000-07:00

I could smell the ribs from Lon's Cookin' Shack on my run today. All day "I need ribs, I need ribs." My friend told me about the Bamboo Hut, lots of carne, little price. The boys and I went for dinner. Yes! they had Dr. Pepper. I never touch soda when I am not pregnant, do not like carbonation. Oh, how I wish I had my camera and wish Scott could have been there with us. My kids are so deprived when it comes to eating out. They plowed through the meat and noodles. They ate the whole kids meal which was enough food for an adult and more. I even let them have the soda that came with their meal (which they almost never get) and 3 refills. I of course took their other cup and soothed my stomache with Dr. Pepper. All through dinner they kept telling me how good the food was. "We should eat there every night. We should come back with Dad. Mom I love you." After I told them they could have a refill on the soda, Garrett jumped out of his chair held his arms out, gave me a huge hug, and a big greasy kiss. I have one more reason now to continue the greasy meat and soda deprivation. The novelty of it earns me the nicest hugs and greasiest kisses.

KFC

2008-09-02T21:36:00.000-07:00

I really needed some carne and grease last night. I ordered the 3 piece chicken meal through the drive through. I hurriedly opened the box when I got home. What? they had left out a chunk of meat. I was MAD. When I called to ask what they would do for me, the boy kind of laughed as he told me they would comp me for it if I wanted to go back then or another day.

Positive

2008-08-30T20:15:00.000-07:00

I need ice in my glass. Water, my beverage of choice, makes me sick to drink. My garden produce is unappetizing to me. We heard the heart beat yesterday for the first time. Preston was concerned the Doctor was going to take the baby out then and there. I assured him that it still had a lot of growing to do. The boys want a boy. Funny how Scott and I have wanted each boy to be a girl and now we would be ecstatic to have either.

Blog

2008-08-29T23:36:00.000-07:00

My very clever, creative, role model of a friend and mother created a blog I think you will enjoy.

Sophistimom. Make sure you enter to win the prize.

Kindergarten

2008-08-26T20:29:00.000-07:00

I didn't even cry when he got on the bus. He was so proud and happy. Preston let everyone at the bus stop know his brother was going to kindergarten.

I don't want to be one of those parents that when the school office sees you coming they all say, "oh great, not her again." The teacher asked for $15.00 from each child for snacks 3 days a week. Can someone tell me why 3 days a week and not all 5? When I asked the teacher what kind of snacks they would be having she said, "graham crackers, pretzels, etc." I said I was concerned about sugary snacks, I almost said fruit snacks (which are crap for all of you who care, give your child a real piece of fruit). Anyway, I have to be careful about my beliefs being pushed onto others. So, the teacher said, "Oh no we stay away from that except for birthdays." Garrett's snack today was fruit snacks and chocolate. Come on, childhood obesity rates are around 18%. If the snacks don't change I will have to complain.

Oh I have lots more to nit pick about and it's only been the first day. I better be careful or I'll be home schooling and I don't think I would be very good at that. So lets get back to how much he loved his first day. His favorite part was riding the school bus. When his school is finished in two months we will walk together. He also liked the two stories they read and recess. He learned school rules and quiet on the bus when you cross the railroad tracks. Scott and I are bursting with pride at our little kindergarten boy.

08/08/08

2008-08-08T22:37:00.000-07:00

Make your own damn pizza (thanks Jaime) and movie night in the backyard.

Uncle Jeff projects the movie onto the fence and we all enjoy. The kids LOVE this, and so do we.

Splash Pool

2008-08-02T20:39:00.000-07:00

Scott was able to come with us today. The boys were clambering all over Mr. Novelty. Garrett said he wanted to learn to swim. I was going to put him in swimming lessons this summer and never ended up doing it. I never had swimming lessons and I swim just fine. The cost. And one more thing in my day to be at by a certain time. These were our last months of unstructured days before school starts. So I never followed through with the lessons.
Today he swam under water, several feet to Scott, over and over and over. He gets it in his head that he wants to do something and he does it. We were amazed!

Cloth Bags

2008-07-30T23:13:00.000-07:00

Oh Crap! I realized at the register I had forgotten my cloth bags. I made them out of thin linen curtains from a yard sale. They roll up small and are always stashed in my purse. I used them for something else and forgot to put them back. I asked the girl at the register to please cram as much into one plastic bag as she could. She used six bags, I repacked into three. She said, "you can recycle those. I said, "it is better not to use at all."
This is for you check-out girl.

Electrical

2008-07-23T21:07:00.000-07:00

For 7 years we have been turning the basement lights on and off at the breaker box. Outlets have wires poking out of them. I ignored the outlets, switches, and lights that hadn't been hooked up. Several hours of electrical work and hell time in the attic on a 90 degree day for Scott and all the electrical in this house is done. Weeks later and I am still opening the breaker box to turn on the basement lights. I keep forgetting the switches work. Amazing our babies have made it through this half finished house with no accidents.

License

2008-07-17T21:49:00.000-07:00

"Save gas great a**!" So says my friend. I thought of this as I rode my bike to renew my drivers license (as if I need it). I feel fortunate to live in an area where walking and biking are so convienent. I long to live in a world without cars.

Conversations

2008-07-15T08:19:00.000-07:00

The boys invited Ezra in while doing their morning jobs. I hear them chatting upstairs about where I am.
G- She's downstairs doing her pilates. Don't bother her or she won't help us with our morning
jobs when she's done.
E- Pilates? What's that?
P- Exercises for her back. Ezra, I don't want my Mom to turn into Augustus Gloop.

My Mom

2008-05-26T12:11:00.000-07:00

There have been three days in my life when the world has stopped for me. My wedding day. The birth of Garrett and the birth of Preston. The world stopped again for me and my siblings on May 9th. My brother Eric called from the hospital to say that Mom had taken a turn for the worse. All nine of us were on our way to her bedside.

My Mom had symptoms of M.S. in her early 20's. It wasn't until her mid forties, that she was positively diagnosed. I remember her desperately hoping it was Limes disease or something else. As an RN she knew what she would go through.

I started losing my Mom years before her death. The hardships from the divorce when she was 51. Living as a single Mom, with a progressively debilitating illness was a hard blow to this fiercely religious, family oriented, mother of ten. She worked for Dr. Thornfeldt (the pediatrician to all of us) until she could no longer walk safely in the office. In a quiet moment he pulled her aside to let her know she needed to think of her safety and those she was caring for. I can't imagine the pain she must have felt at this time, having to give up a work she loved. Working for someone she respected and admired. She then began a home based business selling Nikken Magnets, for health. She was searching for something to heal her and earn a living. Her goal was to make it until the last two at home had graduated. Fortunately Kimberlee (another Isom brainiac) was able to graduate a year early and even made valedictorian of her class. At this point my Mom could rarely walk. She was so thin and tired that day in May of 2000 when we packed up our Idaho home we had lived in for almost 20 years. She sat, head down on her arms, in her motorized chair, with no emotion other than complete exhaustion. In a way she died that day.

She lived in a very nice assisted living facility, in SLC, for three years until she needed full nursing care. I tried to put on a bright face when I went to visit but often I just cried when I entered the room. She knew. Mom knew. She never wanted to live like that and here she was mostly bedridden. In March of this year I had the most wonderful time visiting with her. I spent a few hours with her reading the ensign, brushing her teeth (she always wanted her teeth brushed) writing down memories from her life. I was so happy to finally have her listening and talking. Over the course of the past eight years she has been unable to share much. I have wanted to get inside her head to know why. I assumed that some conversations were just too painful, she was truly tired and worn out, sometimes she wasn't there mentally, sometimes she really did just want to watch the news or Jeopardy.

I never realized and I continue to learn how much my Mom really sacrificed to raise healthy, intelligent, respectable children. As with anyone she was not perfect. She did her best and far more. She made sure we went to church and seminary. We always had clean clothes to wear. Nutritious food to eat. She was always sewing and making do. I remember her even making underwear for my sister and I when we were little. On Christmas Eve she was always in the sewing room making one last gift. And up until all hours sewing Prom dresses for each of us girls. She was ALWAYS at our school activities. She was always at our X country meets, track meets, tennis, wrestling, basketball, football, cheering us on. She was proud of her brood and you knew it. There were nine other children besides her own living in our house at different times for different reasons. She never stopped feeding people and taking care of the needs of others. She was always consoling some sister in the ward who needed her. These women did not even realizing the burdens she herself was carrying. Selfless!

When I walked into her hospital room Thursday, crying, the day before the turn for the worse. She told me, "it's o.k. Shannon, you don't need to cry." Soon after, she said this: "One thing I wish I had done differently with you kids is hold you and love you more. You needed that. I want you to tell your siblings to hold and love their kids. I did a lot of things right with you kids but I wish I would have held and loved you more." This sounded like I'm leaving soon. But she looked good and we were making arrangements to find her a new place for her to live. Even amongst the nine living children I never felt unloved. Mom could not have possibly devoted anymore attention to any of us than she already did.

Friday, when Scott, Jeff, and I arrived at the hospital the room was full with my Utah siblings and some of the grandchildren. I was so overcome with emotion, my family, would these be the last hours? days? with my mom on earth. Danielle had pinned a gardenia to Mom's hospital gown, her favorite flower. Laurie from Washington and John from California made it shortly after that. She was on 100% oxygen and had a feeding tube down her throat. She had said years earlier that she did not want any life support when it was her time to go. This was hard. Casey the 5th child is a doctor, as he and my mom's doctor talked, they were concerned, without being intubated and sedated she might not make it to the following day when the youngest Kimberlee's flight arrived. Mom wavered with the decision to have the breathing tube inserted so she would be able to see Ryan and Kimi before she passed. Two days earlier when she entered the hospital they put one in to stabilize her, she demanded it out shortly there after. Her decision was no breathing tube. She knew she could hold out.

Mom, never lacking a sense of humor, told us all to go home, go to bed, and let her die. She of course said this with a smile. Eric, Laurie, and I laid out sheets and blankets on the floor by her bed that night. I wouldn't have been able to sleep at home and wasn't able to sleep waking to my Mom's every cough when I would get up to suction her out. I left it to Laurie and Eric and tried to sleep in the hallway on a half sofa. The room was quiet when I entered at 5:00 a.m. Mom wanted to watch the news. In a gargled voice she said, "I'm sure we will be treated to a full Bush Wedding." Laurie and Eric went to the cafeteria to get breakfast and I had some nice alone time with Mom. She once again told me to make sure I took time to hold and love my kids. We read Ensign articles and the last chapter of The Geography of Bliss, by Eric Weiner. She was washed and taken care of by the extremely kind nurses. She desperately wanted something to drink. We asked her to please wait until Kimi made it. Only a few ice chips here and there. She aspirates whatever she eats and drinks. Ryan made it by noon with Cash his son, from Wisconsin. Everyone had time with Mom alone and together. She was amazingly coherent even through all the visitors from the family and calls from friends throughout the day.
The baby, of the family, Kimi made it at 4:45 p.m. all the way from China. They had time to talk alone. Ryan's wife Jenn was able to make it with the twins also just before Mom asked to have the oxygen removed. She was tired and ready to go, now that all of us were surrounding her. At 8:30 p.m. everything was removed. She was given a blessing and we hovered. We talked of farm days, growing up, just the nine siblings and my Mom. We laughed and cried and waited. We slept on the floor and in chairs pulled together. As the night wore on into Sunday we were able to celebrate one last Mother's Day with her. She began slipping out of coherency early in the morning. She took her last breath at 1:03 in the afternoon, while all of us held on to her.

The greatest gift you gave to me Mom was/is my siblings. The time we spent together all nine of us in the hospital with you. I am trying to think of words to describe it. I can't. That time with no spouses, no children, just my Mom and siblings. It cannot be replicated. The world stopped for us. We love you Mom.

Garrett's Threat

2008-05-07T08:29:00.000-07:00

"Mom if you don't play I spy with me, I won't let you do your Pilates video in the morning."

Squirrelly

2008-05-07T08:17:00.000-07:00

Preston has been at the table for 45 minutes eating his breakfast of strawberries and toast. PLAIN toast mind you, with NOTHING on it! He can easily sit at the table eating for an hour. I can relate. Had Preston not come along I would still be the slowest eater.

He started out in one chair doing tricks on the chair between bites and warnings to sit down. He moved to the chair next to Garrett and tried really hard sit. I walked into the kitchen and heard a hard smack on the floor and crying. That boy is so squirrelly, when will he learn?

May First A Very Nice Day.

2008-05-02T21:34:00.000-07:00

We biked to the pediatricians for well checks. Garrett proudly read all the letters on the big letter "E" chart. Preston named all the shapes. They lay side by side on the table as the Doctor examined both of them. This visit was so different from all previous visits of frantically feeding and changing, strapping in and out of the car, so difficult to make it on time with two babies. This time it was a pleasant 10 minute bike ride there. You want to take the stairs? Sure we have time. No struggles with changing out of and back into clothes. I prepared them for their shots explaining why they needed them and told them if they didn't cry, even though it would hurt, we would stop at the park and play on the way home. Preston had a shocked look when the needle went in and was so proud that he didn't cry. Garrett had to suffer through 5 shots and a finger prick. No shouts or tears from either.
The park is a different place for us too. They can use all the equipment now. It seems like I was teaching Preston to climb the ladders the last time we were there. Fearful of them falling through the large gaps.
They had a 3 hour nap when we got home and I got the basement sorted.
We had roasted tomato soup and pesto on toast from last summers garden.
I won tickets to the Symphony from last months First Friday's Downtown Gallery Stroll. We walked the few blocks to listen.
The boys had no adverse reactions from their shots.
I love that we are able to bike and ride most everywhere we need to.

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY

2008-04-18T12:16:00.000-07:00

Ten years. Two kids. Thick and Thin. Your hair remains the same, fabulous, even after just waking up. I love you.

Five!

2008-04-15T16:00:00.000-07:00

When the two pink lines showed loud and clear on the pregnancy test I sat there crying and shaking. Wow! I was pregnant. Scott was terrified. He tried to take care of me, bringing me cashews and chips when I needed something to eat. I lay there on the floor and cried. Couldn't someone please bring me something palatable. Aunt Kimi knew how much I needed Sam Hawk. I craved citrus and needed to eat all the time. I gained 50 lbs with you. I wanted greasy fast food all the time and Dr. Pepper slurpies. I had never had a slurpie in my life. Fortunately I couldn't afforded to eat grease and slurpies very often or I would still be working it off.

On my due date, April 9th, I was at work shelving tiles, carrying as much as I could trying to force you out. All the regular customers kept asking me what I was doing at work. I finally went home.

On the 14th I was given a two doses of prostaglandin to hopefully start labor. Those doses created some of the worst pains I have ever felt. At 3:00 a.m. the next morning I stood in the shower and cried until the water ran cold. The terrible pains I was feeling weren't even real contractions. At 4:00 a.m. I could stand it no longer, so we drove to Timpanogos Hospital in the rain. I begged for an epidural even though I was barely dilated to a one. The needle felt so good going in and then I lay there comfortably with the scared new nurse on duty. She freaked every time your heart rate plummeted. Somehow I knew everything would be o.k. even when they screwed that device to your head to better monitor you. I had read so many natural child birth books warning me of all these contraptions. Somehow it didn't matter anymore. I knew everything would be o.k. At 10:30 a.m. fabulous Dr. Wayne Young came in to deliver you, we had been ready for awhile, but it was a very busy day. However, he was quickly rushed right back out to do an emergency C section. There we lay patiently waiting, watching the beginning of the Iraq war. Around 11:30 a.m., in came our fabulous doctor once more. After a few pushes there you were at 11:45 a.m. I was able to see you briefly before they rushed you away to an oxygen tent. At 4:00 p.m. a nurse brought your hungry little body to me. Wrapped in your pink and blue hospital blanket, your face was square, your nose flat and the cone head was beginning diminish. You were my handsome boy. We named you Garrett after exemplary friends that your Dad and I knew separately. And, Ryan after your Uncle Ryan.

You are now the boy that likes to help me in the kitchen. You want to be good and do good. You make my heart melt when you watch out and protect your younger brother. You love babies and are so good to Abbi. You love numbers, we counted to 300+ at dinner last night before you told me to finish counting to a million. You snore when you go to bed exhausted, after a day of climbing trees and stacking bricks on the sidewalk. You love building with the blocks that Scott made you before you were born. You are now 5. Happy birthday Garrett.

For your birthday dinner you asked to eat sushi with Dad. You rode to Demae on your bikes. You flew your birthday kite when you got back and were so wound up and happy. We love you Garrett.

No one received the above birth announcement. We were unable to afford the stamps to mail it out.

Ice Cream

2008-04-08T15:11:00.000-07:00

When Garrett bit his tongue today, lots of blood. I finally got him to stop crying by telling him to let the ice cream bar numb his tongue. I swore I would never use food as a pacifier.
Another Never broken.
My roommate from college tells me I said, "my kids would never have snotty noses." I can't believe I was that unrealistic.

Juice=Love

2008-04-05T22:32:00.000-07:00

I separated yet another fight. Preston on my bed, Garrett banished to his room. Preston asked me to lay beside him as the crocodile tears flowed and he told me of his woes. He said he didn't love me anymore because, Garrett hit him. Each time I kissed him he said, "I still don't love you." Then he said, "A glass of juice would make me love you." When he was almost finished drinking the juice he proclaimed, "I still don't love you."
"Who do you love Preston?"
"Auntie Kahi."
"Do you want to go live with her?"
"No"
He then gupled the last swallow and said,"I love you Mom."

April Fools

2008-04-01T20:47:00.000-07:00

I like what my sister wrote about April Fools. I feel the same. http://kimi-isom.blogspot.com/

Tagged

2008-03-30T19:39:00.000-07:00

TEN YEARS AGO, I was running a short distance to my sisters house for a wedding dress fitting. She was 5 months pregnant with her third, sewing my dress, and organizing our upcoming reception at her house, in a few weeks. Crazy? or amazing? She is pretty amazing! Anyway, I was living in a walkout basement in Washington, with a family of frogs that congregated near my door. I hastily put on my shoes and started running to my sisters. The toe of my shoe felt funny, I kept imagining a frog in there (I have a wild imagination). Her house was less than a mile away so I didn't want to bother taking off my shoe and retying it. When I arrived at her door and discovered the blood on my sock, I wanted to vomit, I shook the dead, crushed frog out.

SNACKS, fruits and vegetables in season. I love the bright, citrus, cleansing taste of grapefruit. Blueberries and black berries in Oregon and Washington. Apples, peaches, and nectarines, from the orchards near my house in Idaho (Oh, how I miss those orchards). Cucumbers and tomatoes from my garden. I love food. Kippered snacks, toasted salted nori.

IF I WERE GIVEN A BILLION DOLLARS, I would pay off our house, invest what I needed to have a steady income for the rest of my life, buy and tear down as many multi unit complexes in our Historic Provo neighborhoods as possible and have other historic homes from our Provo area moved to make our Historic neighborhoods whole and beautiful again. And I want all my favorites who are renting here to buy one of these Historic homes at a screaming price because I like you! I would also get a massage once a week and buy all the wild caught seafood I want. Me, me, me. Of course, I would be generous to others.

I HAVE LIVED in Washington State, Idaho, Utah, Washington State again, Massachusetts, Washington State again, Idaho, and Utah.

JOBS, on the farm in Idaho milking Bubs, changing pipes, polishing the woodwork (family joke). When I was 13 I started working for my father (he was an Oral and Maxillofacial Surgeon) cleaning the instruments and assisting during surgeries. I really do not like medical work. My stomache turns. In college I was so shy and tried many different places to get a job before I ended up as a dishwasher at Carousel Ice Cream Parlour. Awful, Awful, Awful. My friend Julie felt so sorry for me. She thought I could find better. I must say that's all I thought I could get at the time. The following year I begged for a job at The Planted Earth Floral in the greenhouse. Great job. I worked with three other girls, two of whom loved running, foreign films, and gardening like me. Those were great days, the three of us chatting and eating yoghurt covered malt balls from the Good Earth and vegetarian sandwiches from Hoagie Yogi. I worked at Magleby's with my friend Keri for a short time. Then on to The Leather Furniture Company in Portland Oregon where I became a furniture snob. That was a good job for me, I worked with great people and came out of my shell a little. Craft Supplies U.S.A. (a woodturning store) which I affectionately call Crap Supplies. I Hate, Hate, Hated that job. I begged Scott for us to go out on our own remodeling houses, doing handyman work, in the beginning I took on a few house cleaning jobs. I liked that because that is what I am good at. Those were a good few years for us working together. Then Contempo Tile. That was one of my favorite jobs. I worked with great people and a good company. Now I am doing my favorite job ever. I have always wanted to be a Mom, stay at home and take care of my family. This job was made for me. I Love cooking, I like cleaning, doing laundry, gardening, small house repairs, reading to the boys, everyday simple life. This is me.

FIVE THINGS YOU DON'T KNOW ABOUT ME.
1-I hate carpet. I think it is one of the most disgusting germ laden "luxuries" in modern day living. Especially if you don't remove your shoes in your house. Think about the parking lots, gas station bathrooms, fast food joints, dog poop, etc. all rubbed in to that fiber that your baby is lying on. DISGUSTING.
2-I LOVE See's chocolates. Coffee flavored, and dark chocolate truffles are my favorites.
3-I was a painfully shy child, well into late teens, early twenties. I was the kid who hid my face under my desk, big afro and all. Most likely because I was teased mercilessly about my BIG hair.

4-I loved milking Bubs our milk cow. My brother used to bribe me into milking her, promising me a bag of Cheetos. I never let him know I really liked milking the cow.
5- I love traveling. I spent a summer in Sweden on an exchange program when I was 15. I backpacked through Europe with my sisters Danielle and Laurie when I was 19. A family cruise to Puerto Rico, St. Croix and St. Thomas. Scott and I went to Italy on our honeymoon, Greece for our 1 year anniversary and Spain, Portugual and Morrocco the following year. Now we are awaiting that billion so we can travel again.

Is anyone still reading? If you are, your it.

Flats

2008-03-26T21:06:00.000-07:00

As a child a flat bike tire was BAD news at my house. It could be months before anyone who knew how to repair it got around to it. I feared the puncture vine that grew all along the ditch bank roads.Scott on the other hand claims to have had tires that were all patches, as a child, from his constant repairing. Last summer Scott taught me how to repair flats but I still waited on him to fix all tires. Today I could wait no longer and fixed the flat on my bike and the trailer on my own. Had I known it was so easy I would have been patching them long ago.

Reading Room

2008-03-25T20:11:00.000-07:00

Our Sunday visitor told us about it. After a nice nap we drove to it. We rarely use more than a tank of gas a month. After living in an area where we don't have to drive. We are increasingly loathe to drive. We actually loaded up, for a drive. I can't think of a time when we have ever done this.

We think we found the spot for our Reading Cabin. Our getaway. Our first one was built up above Buckley's Mine in Rock Canyon. Shortly after we moved here 9 years ago. That was abandoned, unfinished, once we began working and schooling. Scott has been planning, dreaming, designing, a shelter basically, no electricity, no plumbing. A simple escape from the city. Well, I like running water and electricity. It will definitely be simple though. Around five hundred square feet. An architectural masterpiece, an efficient use of space. A place to read, escape, and sleep. Only 20 minutes from our driveway. Most of all the landscape is bare and simple. I can see the sun set and rise. Still years away.

Baby Again

2008-03-23T21:37:00.000-07:00

Completely out of the blue:
P-"Mom, do you have a baby inside of you?"
Me-"No, I am not pregnant Preston, why?"
P-"I want a baby, mom"